The Care and Feeding of Children
Or: The Drivel We are Force-Fed in the Name of Religion

<Disclaimer>
This post is totally and completely off-topic.

I woke up in the night and, as is my practice, looked immediately at the clock to see if I needed to get up or if I could grab another hour or two of sleep. The clock said six-something and I immediately thought, oh, I have to get up. Then I noticed it was still dark outside.

Now here are the machinations of a warped brain for you: Instead of remembering that the power went out for ten minutes last night and thinking maybe I had inadvertently reset the clock, I immediately wondered why it was still dark at 6:xx. I thought, did the second coming of Christ or the rapture or whatever you want to call it occur and I slept through it? Oh, I guess that means I'm not going to heaven. Ahhh, I don't have to make my duty call to my mother this morning, as there's no question that she went straight to heaven.

The longer I laid there, the more I started laughing at myself and musing about the religious gobbledy-gook that was crammed down my throat as a child.

In case you're wondering, by the time 6:00 really came, the sky really got light. Christ didn't return last night.

And yes, I do believe it should be a crime to raise children in religions where they are taught that nonsense is truth.