The Battle of the Sexes

I believe men and women think very differently about their attractiveness to members of the opposite sex.

I think women will look at a man and assess, based on various factors, whether or not he would be interested in her — whether or not she would stand a chance of getting something going with him. I think men see a pretty face (or shapely body) and set out to add it to their lists.

I will look at a man who is fit and buff and, after looking in my mirror in my mind, determine that he wouldn't be interested in me, who carries an extra 15 pounds around. I look at a man driving a high-priced car or with a very fine wardrobe and think he wouldn't be interested in someone who loves to make her own clothes and has a very eclectic wardrobe. I look at a man who is breathtakingly handsome and think he wouldn't be interested in plain ol' ordinary me.

Men, on the other hand . . . . Well, I can't tell you the number of e-mails I got when I was active on Match and other sites from men who had absolutely nothing in common with me, whose personal attributes were nowhere on my "what I'm looking for" list. Basically, if you have a pretty face and post a good photo, you'll get mail. Did you see the piece on CBS Sunday Morning a few weeks ago about photo manipulation, where the Photoshop geek in NYC opined that 100% of the photos on Match are digitally manipulated? (In NYC, that's probably true. In Tucson, fugedaboutit!)

Give me a man who is realistic, who can look at my profile or my lifestyle and say, "I would fit into that" or "That's not a good fit for me."

I don't care for reality TV (except Project Runway) but I do love reality.