Are You the Best?

I've heard several conversations in the past week or so on talk radio shows about people wanting to be the best. The very best in their field. The very best of anyone doing whatever it is they do.

When you are a jack-of-many-trades, as I am, that's a tough standard by which to be measured. I have had a multi-faceted career (makes you think of a diamond, huh?). I've been a writer, secretary, bookkeeper, editor, database specialist, office manager, applications developer, blah, blah, blah. I've been a professional singer, professional accompanist, lounge pianist, theatre music director, piano teacher. I've made compelling words to read and beautiful music to shop by. I've had clothing I've made purchased off my back—literally!

But the best? The very best? I'm not.

I have a son who is at the top of his field in Web site development. I have a son who knows the insides and the outsides of powerful network servers for very large companies—who is relied upon night and day to keep their business running. I have a daughter-in-law who is the most amazing wedding and lifestyle photographer. These three talented and skilled adults could easily be measured against that standard and walk away smiling.

As I think about all the things I do in my basement workrooms, as I try to create things that people would want to own, I want to create something that's uniquely mine. I don't want to copy anyone else or do anything mediocre. I guess I actually do want to be the best at something, some small artistic niche that can be mine—all mine.

And in trying to find that niche, I knock myself out trying to learn everything I can about all sorts of art forms. Last week I learned how to make fabric-wrapped rope bowls with Susan Breier's It's a Wrap: Sewing Fabric Purses, Baskets, And Bowls. I made a purple bowl to hold my knitting in the family room when our new couch arrives. I made a plate on which to place this very cool art piece that the Jazzman brought with him. (I'm trying to protect my leather ottoman from being creased by the base.) I'll make a few more of these bags and bowls and plates before I decide that there are plenty of other people who can do this better than I.

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Can I be brutally honest here? I don't love that plate. I didn't turn out in either the shape or the look I wanted. I was trying to make a rimmed plate, and it's not. I was trying to make something that simulated the base of the art piece—sorta pewtery-bronzey. And it doesn't. So if you're thinking, "Geez, that's an ugly manipulation of clothesline," that's okay. I'm right there with you. I've got some acrylic metallic paint in the basement that I'm going to experiment with to see if I can get closer to my mental image.
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This week I'm working my way through Ann Johnston's "Color by Accident". I've been dyeing more and enjoying it less lately. My colors are washed-out—not at all what I'm trying to create. So I'm going to see what I can learn in an attempt to perfect my technique.

So I guess I'm trying to find a best in some little niche area.

But I still don't feel like I'm a Best. I don't feel like the things I do really matter. Son #1 keeps an enormous company's servers running. Son #2 helps local businesses manipulate the Web to bring in more business. DIL gives brides and grooms the most incredible images with which to remember their weddings.

I help. I help Son #2 keep his clients' sites current. I help by providing care for my grandchildren to enable Son #2 and DIL to find the time they need to follow their passions. I help the Jazzman get daily errands run while he's working his 12+ hour days. I do what I can to help.

But I'm not the Best, and I wonder if this pressure, this societal frenzy to be the Best isn't doing more harm, contributing to a greater sense of failure, than necessary.

Last year, when DIL dropped off Beautiful Grandchildren at school in the mornings, she would say, "Do your best."

Isn't that the point? Shouldn't that be the point?

Do your best. Do your best. If you make potholders to give to elderly house-bound neighbors or if you create an app to help people stay on top of their finances and be better prepared for retirement…. Whatever it is you do, just do your best.

Your best.